


I'm leaving

by FionaFoe



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-24
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2019-01-05 00:30:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12179472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FionaFoe/pseuds/FionaFoe
Summary: Reader and John are just two broken people finding their way to one another, but how long lived can happiness really be?





	I'm leaving

Slouched down in the couch of the crappy motel room in the middle of nowhere, you watched  dust dance through the air, the tiny stip of light filtering in through the mostly closed curtains illuminating the dizzying display. The sun shining outside painted the room a burgundy hue, color seeping in from the sun-paled curtains.

 _“It’s five o’clock somewhere,”_ you thought as you unscrewed the cap of the fresh bottle of vodka. You preferred scotch, but the smell of vodka was easier to mask. Better to stay safe, just in case you had to leave the room at some point in the day… not that that was part of any of your plans. Most people tended to frown upon liquor drinking at noon, and with the clear liquid working its way through your bloodstream, your plan to finish as much of the bottle as you could was well under way, the need to become numb, to be lulled into a heavy, hopefully dreamless sleep coursing through you.

Sleep was fleeting these days, and those were the best nights; the ones where you didn’t dream of him; where you didn’t see him reaching for you with big, strong hands and that line appearing on his forehead when he furrowed his brow in worry, asking you not to leave. Weird thing was, the words that had started your entire love affair had been those two little words, _I’m leaving_.

* * *

 

“I’m leaving,” you’d leaned in close to the stranger sitting next to you, close enough to smell the whiskey on his breath and the subtle mix of cologne and sweat. He’d been eyeing you all night without speaking so much as a word to you and your whiskey-fogged mind broke your long silence. “Wanna come?”

With no reply, you were positive you’d struck out as you stood up to leave, and yet, he surprised you when he followed you out the door. You didn’t even know his name when he backed you up against the hard, rough brick wall of the bar and laid his lips on yours but it was the most thrilling kiss you’d ever had. He kissed you with the urgency and hunger of a man sentenced to death, and you replied with your neediness to feel something real.

“That was… intense.” You cooed when it was over, staring into deep hazel eyes, “I’m Y/N.”

“John.” Was all he’d answered before taking you by the hand and leading you to his slick black truck, the drive to his motel mostly quiet. Only a few, well chosen words were spoken between you, which was fine. You felt no need to know his life story, just the need for what he had to offer thrumming between your legs.

His room was dim, not just dim lighted, the entire palette of the room was depressing. The dullness of his surroundings a shocking contrast to the man who’d brought you there. However, his mysterious demeanor had you buzzing with excitement. You felt more exhilarated than you had in years. And all from a simple, no effort hookup. That was not how it usually happened. Usually you did your thing and left in a hurry with the hope that it would cure that dull ache in your heart for a little while before you tried to get some decent sleep.

The two of you tearing at your clothes, you marvelled at the sight of his bare chest, his long torso peppered in dark hair and more than a few scars. Wondering for a moment if he was dangerous, you decided not to care. You were nothing, if not a risk taker at this point.

Your eyes traveled south, dropping to what had really lured you to him back at the bar. He was a well endowed man, no question about it, and you felt satisfied with your choice for the evening. Looking back up to meet his eyes, you found them scanning your naked form, having gone dark with lustful hunger and you couldn’t help but feel flattered. His dark eyes held the same intensity his kiss possessed, and you only hoped he’d be as all-consuming when you got him between the sheets.

John did not disappoint. Seconds later he’d practically thrown you on the bed, following you like a lion stalking its prey. He set to work on ravaging every inch of your needy skin with his lips and teeth, making the breath hitch in your chest from the sensation. The intensity you’d craved was stronger than you could have possibly imagined. Forceful fingers clawed down your writhing body as if he was searching for gold leaving your flesh buzzing with electric anticipation in their wake.

As his long fingers finally reached what they’d ventured down to find, you had to bite you lip to not let out the scream he’d built up in you on his journey down. Skillful fingers sought out your jumping clit, making you fist the sheets beneath you, John’s mouth sealing around your pebbled nipple not helping your white-knuckle grip. His teeth bit down on your raised bud and there was no way you could hold the scream back any longer. As two expert fingers worked their way down, teasing at your entrance and leaving his thumb to take care of your clit, the pleasure pain of his teeth on your nipple made you cry out in delight, your back arching up to give him as much of your body as he wanted. You could feel his lips tugging into a smile against your skin and the hum of a light, cocky chuckle sent vibrations through you, bringing you closer to your release.

Clearly, a man of such experience he read every sign your body had unwittingly made. John knew you were getting close. He could feel it with every wet lave over your rosy nipples, and he could feel it when he finally slipped his fingers into your wanting hole. He bit down harder at the way your walls clenched around his thick digits, your deep moans urging him on. Thrusting, he warmed you up for what you knew was coming, and the thought of his now rock hard cock pushed you closer to the edge. John hooked his fingers, hitting the perfect spot inside of you, and you cried out. Sweet, tantric pleasure surged through you, your eyes rolling back in ecstasy as you came hard on his hand.

Panting on the mattress, your hands still fisting the scratchy sheets, John positioned himself between your quivering thighs. Not yet having come down from your high, your sex still pulsing with the aftershock of your orgasm, you felt the blunt, precum-covered head of his impressive length pushing against your entrance. You took a deep, staggering breath as you felt him slowly sliding into you, your walls stretching to accommodate the delicious girth of his gorgeous cock. Leaning down to meet your lips, he kissed you with an unexpected tenderness. You welcomed it, letting the sudden softness of his kiss play out.

One tender moment was more than enough for the both of you, and the moment he broke the kiss, his cock slammed into you, his hips meeting yours as he filled you to the brim. You took his entire length, a wanting gasp escaping your lips where his kiss still lingered. Latching onto his broad, muscular shoulders, your fingers dug into his flesh as he started sliding back out, leaving you keening for more. His thrusts were forceful and fast, practically fucking you down into the mattress as you hooked a quivering leg around his waist, the new angle making him pound into your g-spot. Just as you felt the start of a promisingly strong orgasm coming on, he stopped and pulled out, leaving you sex-dazed and confused.

“Hands and knees.” he merely growled, his gravelly voice and demanding tone sending shivers down your spine.

You obeyed. Quickly shuffling to all fours atop the creaking bed, he thrust back into you when you were positioned to his liking, making you purr in delight as he quickly regained his previous speed and force. The pleasure almost too much to bear, you leaned forward, away from him. John wasn’t having it and he responded by roughly gripping your hips, slamming you back into him, screams of rabid pleasure escaping your lips. When you thought you couldn’t take a single second more of the torturous perfection, a forceful push of his hand had you planting your face in the musty sheets, your hands spread out in front of you, desperate for something, anything to hold onto. John gave no sign of slowing down and after just a few more earth-shattering moments of his cock slamming into you, he pressed his body to yours, one hand gripping at the curve of your waist and the other covering the back of your neck, his weight pushing you further into the mattress, leaving you at his mercy and pleasure. The orgasm he’d been denying you built rapidly with your body trapped between his and the mattress. Begging him to keep it up, to brutally fuck you into the shitty motel bed, the dam broke and your walls clenched tight around him.

“Fuck, sweetheart… So tight!” he groaned in return, twitching and releasing inside of you just after another deep-throated grunt fell from his lips.

 

* * *

 

You couldn’t claim your love affair had been perfect; you knew you weren’t the love of his life, and he wasn’t yours. You were just two people getting by after being drop kicked by fate. Yet, there was something about your connection which was so pure and natural, it was crazy to call it anything other than love. The kind of love that gets you through the day, that makes you keep going. You stuck around and in time you found your normal with him. He’d travel doing the job, checking up on two grown sons, and you tagged along trying to help where you could. All of it, you just accepted. Monsters? Sure, why the hell not? You’d seen so much in your life, it was really just expected. The unexpected part had been the happiness you’d found with him. Smiling as he walk in the room,  he lit up at the sight of you there waiting for him. It was just so effortless, like the way you’d picked him up. You fell into each other’s rhythm and didn’t have to apologize or hide any parts of who you  really were. There was a silent and comforting understanding between the two of you.

That was of course before he’d drawn closer to it; his white whale. John had shrivelled up with the cause and become a shell of his former self. You watched him deteriorate, become obsessed with revenge in a whole new way and in the end you just couldn’t stay to watch him kill himself for the mission. You didn’t have it in you. If you stayed, you’d surely burn out, yourself. You’d go back to that dark place, to where you’d been when you met him. Love yourself first, you knew that was the right thing to do, but it didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

Standing there, bag in hand, you swallowed hard when  he came home from a hunt.

 _“I’m leaving.”_ You’d merely stated it, your voice tight and cold, not letting yourself feel it.

 _“Stay.”_ He’d pleaded, reaching his hand out to you, furrowing his brow, those dark eyes you loved so much doing that worried thing they did.

He’d known it really was no use to argue, yet, he went through the motions. He knew you had to go and that he had to let you. In the end you wondered if he’d even wanted it, not having you there as a distraction to keep him from his valiant cause. The scene had played on loop, a never-ending rerun in your head, you’d analyzed every second of that last day, that last kiss, that last look at his handsome face. And now, you sat alone, having drank the morning away. Again. Half a bottle left, half a bottle drunk. Afternoon glow peeking through the crack of the curtains, the new drink in your hands a feeble attempt to silence the voice in your head.

_“If you hadn’t left, maybe he’d still be alive…”_


End file.
